1. |
Intro (Up Scumbag)
01:10
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2. |
You Are Not Bruce Lee
02:11
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Flailing arms and spinning kicks
Why are you even here you dick
There's always some cunt in white
Fighting off invisible bad guys
With shit tattoos on skinny arms
Or fat with backwards cap on head
I hope you hit the wrong person
And they shit down your neck
This is why we can't have nice things
You are not Bruce Lee
You're a fucking liability
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3. |
Get A Job, Parkour Twats
01:44
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Running, Flips
Jumping, Flips
Climbing, Flips
Eating, Flips
Backflip off a shed
Jumping over walls
Falling off the roof
And I laugh
When you hurt yourself
It's the best of all
You thought you were cool
Now you have no teeth and can't walk
It's a really stupid thing to you and I do hope you hurt yourself
Get a job
Parkour Twats
You're impressing nobody
Get a job
Parkour Twats
You're worse than skater kids
Get a job
Parkour Twats
Mummy and Daddy are sick of your shit
Get a job
Parkour Twats
Or free run off a bridge
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4. |
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Straining too hard and
I think that I have blown a gasket
I've been here twenty minutes
And now the pain is searing
Pushing and crying with every breath
In the bowl there is crimson death
I should not have eaten all the cheese board
Now I'm having shits that look like abortions
A ruptured pile is really quite sore
And I'm having shits that look like abortions
Far too much spicy food
Bowels are facing execution
Passing like acid
Think I need a blood transfusion
You've been warned about times like these
With vile corrosive properties
I should not have eaten the chili
Now I'm having shits that look like abortions
Feeling like burns of the second degree
And I'm having shits that look like abortions
Watch what you eat, it could happen to you
And you'll be having shits that look like abortions
Don't strain too hard when you do what you've got to do
Or you'll be having shits that look like abortions
Too
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5. |
Battlewank
03:47
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Thousands of years ago a method was devised
To settle arguments without fighting
Two people would enter into the colosseum
And scream the sacred working
Take off your pants
Male or female it's all the same
Ready your dominant hand
Prepare to rub and take your aim
Battlewank
Unleash the fury of the
Battlewank
A tide of raging seas
Battlewank
Unleash the power of the
Battlewank
Battlewank
Furiously the warriors would stand their ground
They'd stare each other in the eyes
And then they'd reach into their pants and bring it out
And proceed to rub it everywhere in sight
Take off your pants
Male or female it's all the same
Ready your dominant hand
Prepare to rub and take your aim
Battlewank
Unleash the fury of the
Battlewank
A tide of raging seas
Battlewank
Unleash the power of the
Battlewank
Battlewank
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6. |
Cake
00:13
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CAKE
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7. |
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*screaming*
Jared Leto
Upside Down
In A Ditch
On Fire
*more screaming*
Repeat
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8. |
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I
Don't care about your offspring
Stop showing them to me
Their appearance is disgusting
They're the biggest STD
They break everything they touch
Get them off my Facebook feed
You should have used protection
Instead of passing on your genes
They can't even feed themselves
They scream, they cry, the way they look
Makes me feel fucking ill
Every single baby looks like
Winston Fucking Churchill
So this goes out to all the members of the baby club
Please please for the love of God
Don't bring them to the pub
I just want to drink my pint in peace
Your children are ugly
So stop fucking breeding
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9. |
Clawplach
02:35
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A fight to the death in the name of tradition and honour
And whether abbreviations count in Scrabble
They don't
Love Anger Passion for disembowelling
Clawplach
Beat the hell out of you with my mangled sliced off arm
Everyone has gone to have their sex
Ane die
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Scumbag College Brighton, UK
NOISY SONGS ABOUT STUPID SHIT
GRIND METAL PUNK FOR THOSE WHO THINK THE SCENE'S A BIT TOO FUCKING SERIOUS
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